Decision Fatigue

 

My Brain Hurts: 

A Discussion Around Decision Fatigue

Many of you have probably felt Decision Fatigue and didn't even know it.  Working parents especially experience this problem, because they have at least 2 full time jobs - their actual paying career AND their full time job as a spouse and parent, let alone all the other roles they fill, such as friend, daughter/son, brother/sister, church member...the list goes on.

In this week's episode of the Married & Confused Podcast, that my colleague and I host, we define and discuss decision fatigue.  I wrote this blog post as a compansion to that episode.  If you'd like to listen, here's the link. https://podcastle.ai/show/married-confused-4B72/episode-16-my-brain-hurts-a-discussion-about-decision-fatigue-CC85.

What Is Decision Fatigue?

So, what, you might ask, is decision fatigue?
According to the American Medical Association, Decision Fatigue is, simply put, is a "state of mental overload that can impede a person's ability to continue making decisions".  It is not a diagnosable medical condiion, but more of a phenomenon.  As a person makes more and more decisions throughout the day, they becoming increasingly physically, mentally, and emotionally, drained or exhauseted.  When this happens, the person begins to struggle with executive functioning.  Executive functioning refers to the skills we use to manage everyday tasks, such as making plan, solving problem, and adapting to new situation.  It also is associated with the areas of the brain that deal with information processing and emotion processing.  As you can imagine, this can have a wide range of consequences, including the perceived inability to make any further decisions or having impaired judment.

Why Does Decision Fatigue Happen?

Anyone can experience it, but it shows up the most when:

• You are already required to make a lot of decisions throughout the day.  People and professions such as judges, police officers, teachers, and doctors are some common examples, but many of us have jobs that require us to make numrous quick decisions every day.  They don't have to be big, life-alterning decisions, but we have to make many.  By the end of the day, you might just feel tapped out and not want to have to think or make any other decisions.  You'd be happy to just have someone else make the choices.
• Your decisions impact other people.  This could include your spouse, your children, your employees or colleagues, or even your friends and family.  Depending on your job and daily life, it may even be people you don't know!  Sometimes it's as small as whether to rush through a yellow light, or stop and wait for it to turn green again.  When our decisions impact others, we tend to put a higher value or weight on the decision, thus causing more exhaustion to ourselves.
• You're in the midst of a difficult life situation or transition.  Deciding what you want from the menu at McDonald's isn't usually difficult.  After all, you're familiar with the menu, you may often get the same thing, but if you're in the midst of remodeling your home and/or preparing it for sale, choosing paint colors, etc., making a meal choice may feel overwheming.  Choosing a boquet of your favorite flowers may usually be fairly easy, but may feel impossible when choosing them for a loved one's memorial service.
• You're faced with uncertainty.  When we don't have much information or control over our own circumstances, it can feel really difficult to make a decision.  Usually we are able to make decisions based on a certain amount of known information.  This was especially the case during the height of the COVID pandemic of 2020, because we didn't yet have much information about the virus or the consequences it or our choices would have.  Any time we have to make a decision with very limited information, it increases the dificult exponetially, thus making it more draining for us.
• You have perfectionist tendencies.  If you have this tendency, you may often feel paralyized in decision making, for fear that you'll make the "wrong" decision.  Or you over-think every decision.  Any time we over-think something, it is exhausing and depleted our brain.  Why do you think it's called "OVER-thinking"?

It's likely that, at some point, you've fallen into at least one of those categories or do on a regular basis.  So, how do you know when day to day frustrations have turned into decision fatigue?

How Do I Know If I Suffer From Decision Fatigue?

IBelow is a ist of 8 common symptoms of Decision Fatigue.  But remember, Decision Fatigue is not a chronic experience.  It is a short-lived experience.  If you're experiencing these symptoms every day, something else may be going on for you and you might want to seek professional help.

• Procrastination or Decision Avoidance - if you forget your doctor's appoint, you won't have to face a possible scary diagnosis or further test or have to decide whether ot move forward with an expensive surgery.  It's a way to avoid your fears.  Putting off decisions, or avoiding people or situations all together, is one of the most common signs of decisions fatigue.  You may even do it without realizing it.
• Impulsivity - if you've have to make multiple decisions, especially complex decisions all day, you could find yourself being less careful or particular about other choices you have to make.  For example, you've been trying to eat healthy and maintain a balanced diet, but you end up stopping at the drive-thru on your way home.  Or maybe you end up spending way too much on Amazon, as you mindlessly scroll through it at night.  Or maybe even calling an ex, when you know full well that you shouldn't, because it always gets you in trouble and you regret it later.  Or writing a snarky email response to a colleague or your boss.  Impulsivity can take a wide range of forms AND have a wide range of consequences.
• Exhaustion - Decision Fatigue is physically, mentally, & emotionally taxing.  It drains every part of you.  So it shouldn't come as a surprise that you really just suddenly need a nap or even a good cry.  That exhaustion renders you almost incapable of managing your physical or emotional needs.
• Brain Fog - do you every find yourself suddenly having a hard time finishing your sentences?  Do you feel like you can't even remember what you were jus talking about or where your put that important document?  Are you forgeting names or getting distracted when people are trying to talk to you?  This could be due to Decision Fatigue.  However, if this is happening more frequently than not, it may be due to other causes or life stressors and you may need to seek profesional help.
• Irritability - Has a spouse or friend told you that you're being a grumpy-butt?  Or have you ever just bit your spouse or friend's head off for no real reason?  Like, they just asked where you want to go for lunch or what you brought for lunch.  Often, other people in our lives may notice this change easier or before we do.  Take heed.  If so, you might be suffering from decision fatigue.  When you find yourself irritable or unusually short-tempered, that may be the case.
• Overwhelmed - Do you feel like there's literally no more room left in your brain to take in anymore information, much less process the information that's already there?  Does it feel like being given one more tiny piece of information might just cause all the balls your mentally juggling, to come crashing down?  Yeah, that could be decision fatigue.
• Regret or Dissatisfaction - if you made a choice or decision, but you find yourself second guessing it and questioning it hours later, it could be a result of decision fatigue.  This could be especially true if the choice or decision you made was the type of decision you make regularly throughout the day, but today it just felt especially hard.
• Physical Discomfort - sometimes the stress of making a difficult decision can cause physcial symptoms, as well, from headaches, to neck and shoulder tension, to involuntary eye twitching or even nausea.  These may be some of the extreme symptoms of Decision Fatigue.

How to Prevent Decision Fatigue

First, you should know that most everyone experiences Decision Fatigue from time to time.  That's okay.  That's "normal".  We can't always control every situation in our lives.  But we can develop protective measures that can make the fatigue less likely to occur and more manageable, if it does.

• Remove Choice or Options from Some Elements of Your Life - You may have heard the stories about Steve Jobs or Barack Obama who have spoken publically about how they wear basically the same thing every day, thus eliminating one small decision they have to make.  Whether it's what you wear, what route you drive to and from work, which podcast you listen to, or which brand of mayonaise you buy at the store, the more decisions we can essentially eliminate or automate, the better it is for our brain and our overall well-being.
• Delegate (when possible) - some decision are always going to be yours to make, no matter what.  And sometimes the buck stops with you based on your position or title.  But sometimes, it's okay to let other people handle things.  Now I know you perfectionists have a hard time letting go because you feel like no one can do it as well as you.  And the people you delegate to may make a mistake every once in a while, but so with you, especially if you have Decision Fatigue.  So go ahead, let some of your colleagues or employees take the lead on some of the smaller decisions.  Everything will be okay.  In fact, you may even be pleasantly surprised.  Or you may be giving someone a professional development opportunity without even realizing it.
• Prioritize Sleep - what do people often say when faced with difficult choices?  "Let me sleep on it."  There's a reason for that.  Researhc shows that we take more time to consider and make better decisions, early in the day, before our brains get inundated with everything else.  That same reseatch shows that sleep-deprived people tend to have poor impulse control and emotion regulation skills.  So, if you find yourself in a particularly decision-heavy phase of life, make the extra effort to get a good night's sleep to protect against Decision Fatigue.
• Exercise - you've likely heard that exercise is good, not only for your body, but for your brain, especially as you get older.  But did  you know that it can also help you make better decisions?  A study in the British Journal of Sports Medicine found that coupling 30 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise, with a three minute walking break every half hour, can actually improve executive functioning.  But if that sounds like a lot to you, start small.  Any exercise is better than none.  And walking is one of the best and easiest ways to get some exercise in and it can do wonders for your overal mental and physical health.
• Manage Stress - utilizing stress-management techniques and activities throughout your daily routine can help you feel less stressed and less overwhelmed and more confident when faced with many or difficult decisions.
• Make Time for Self-Care - we hear this over and over lately, how important self-care is.  But don't immediately "poo poo" this idea.  It doesn't always mean what you think it means.  Caring about yourself and your own well-being isn't selfish.  You can't help others if you aren't caring for yourself.  You can pour from an empty container.  Even the airlines tell us to put on our oxygen mask first, before helping others.  Having a self-care routine in place, can prevent Decision Fatigue and/or make it easier to manage, if it does happen.  Prior to retiring from my full time job in public Child Welfare, my colleagues and I routinely used puzzling as a form of self-care in the work place.  We always had a puzzle out on a table and would use that to de-stress  throughout the day.  Self-care doesn't always mean mani/pedis and massages.
• Build Some Down Time Into Your Day - Life can get so busy, we sometimes forget to give our brains a chace to shut down for a while.  You need down time where you don't have to make decisions, think about things, or analyze anything.  This can be anything from watching mindless reality TV on your phone, on your lunch break, puzzling with friends, meditating, or taking a walk.  It could also mean sitting in your car a few extra minutes when you get home, before entering the house, to allow for a period of transition from one role to another.

When To Seek Help

Decision Fatigue is NOT a chronic condition.  It's does last for days, weeks, or months.  It's usually an acute situation and you can recover reasonably quickly.  In fact, you'll probably feel better or back to normal after a day or two, and get back to your regular level of functioning.

If you feel like you continue to experience these symptoms of Decision Fatigue, or other worrysome symptoms, on a daily basis, over a longer period of time, it is a good idea to talk to a therapist or doctor.  When these symptoms last longer than expected, you could be suffering from from anxiety, depression, PTSD, or some other mental health condition that you can get help with.

As hard as it can be to experience Decision Fatigue, as the infamous Scarlett O'Hara would say, "Tomorrow is another day." and if you're truly dealing with Decision Fatigue, the passing of one day can make a big difference.   If you don't feel better after giving your body and mind the chaance to recalibrate and refresh, then it's probably time to talk to someone.  A good therapist can help you.  If you find yourself wondering if you should see a therapist, then chances are you probably should.

You could just need some short term help to get you back on track, or you may find that you have something more serious going on and can benefit from some longer term support.

After reading this blog post, if you find that you may need additional support and help managing any of these symptoms, or you'd like to find out if it's something more significant, please visit my website and schedule a free 15 minute consultation - www.brittaniedmillslmft.com.

I provide online couples and individual counseling throughout Tennessee, South Carolina, Florida, and California.

If you'd like to see any of my previous blog posts, please click here.

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