This Therapist's Therapy

  From ‘Me’ to ‘We’:  Unlock the Secret to Shared Interests with Your Partner One of the keys to a healthy thriving relationship is discovering shared interests. Whether you're just starting out or have been together for years, developing activities that both you and your partner enjoy can deepen your bond, bring about better communication, and create lasting memories. Let’s dive into how you can start building shared interests by reflecting on key aspects of your relationship. 1. Where Did You and Your Partner Meet? Thinking about where you and your partner first met can be a great start for developing shared interests. Was it at a concert, a mutual friend’s party, or perhaps a hiking trip? Where or how you met may already hint at common interests or values you share. For example, if you met at a social event, you may both enjoy activities that involve interacting with others, such as game nights or group adventures.  You could consider joining some groups that plan activities tog

An "I" for an "I": 6 Steps to Using "I" Statements Effectively The Power of "I" Statements in Marriage  Communication is key to any healthy marriage. When couples argue or face challenges, the way they express their feelings and needs can either bring them closer together or drive them further apart. One of the most effective tools for improving communication and reducing conflict is the use of "I" statements. Here's why "I" statements are so powerful and how you can use them to strengthen your marriage. Understanding "I" Statements "I" statements are a communication tool that focuses on expressing and taking ownership of your own feelings, needs, and experiences rather than blaming or criticizing your partner. By starting your sentences with "I" rather than "You," you take responsibility for your emotions and reduce the chances of your partner feeling attacked or defensive.  I'm

  The Power of Presence Does it feel like you're living in a world that never seems to stop. Days are filled with to-do lists, notifications, and the ever-present pressure to be productive. In our fast-paced world, it’s easy to get caught up in the rush of daily life.  In this digital age, it's gotten easier and easier to "build" friendships and have meetings virtually, to the point that we've been lulled into thinking that the virtual interactions can truly replace in person interactions. We're often distracted by work, technology, and our own thoughts, leaving little room for genuine connection with others. Yet, one of the most profound gifts we can offer another person is our full, undivided presence. What Does It Mean to Be Present with Others? Being present with someone means truly engaging with them, mind and body. It’s about setting aside distractions, focusing on the person in front of you, and actively participating in the interaction. This kind of pr

  Mirror, Mirror: 9 Tips for Reflective Listening Reflective Listening: Tips for Couples in Therapy One of the main issues that couples come to therapy for is communication problems.  In fact, communication is often at the heart of many relationship challenges. Reflective Listening is a powerful tool that can help couples bridge gaps, deepen understanding, and rebuild trust. As a therapist, here are some tips I often share with couples to help them master the art of reflective listening in their relationship. 1. Prioritize a Calm and Open Environment For reflective listening to be effective, both partners need to feel safe and comfortable. This means setting aside time to talk when neither of you is rushed, distracted, or overly emotional. Choose a time when you can both focus on the conversation and each other. Pro Tip :Agree on a “talk time” where you can sit together without distractions like phones or TV. This dedicated time shows your commitment to really hearing each other.  I of

  The Importance of Disclosing Personal History to Your Spouse As I have asked around for blog post topics, this topic emerged several times. So, I thought we would go ahead and tackle this important subject. In every relationship, especially in marriages, open communication is key to building trust and deepening intimacy. Disclosing personal history to your spouse can be a daunting task, but it is a crucial aspect of fostering a strong and resilient partnership. This can include information anywhere from body count to childhood trauma and anything in between. This blog post explores the significance of sharing your past experiences, how it can enhance your relationship, and practical tips for making this disclosure a positive experience. Why Disclosing Personal History Matters Building Trust: Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship. When you choose to disclose personal history, you demonstrate vulnerability. This openness invites your spouse to reciprocate, leading to a

                           Mental Illness in Marriage:                                Understanding & Managing One Partner's Diagnosis Marriage is often seen as a partnership built on love, trust, and companionship, but what happens when one partner is diagnosed with a mental health condition? The impact can be significant, affecting not just the individual but also the dynamic of the relationship. Understanding this influence and finding ways to manage it together is essential for maintaining a healthy marriage. The Ripple Effect of a Mental Health Diagnosis Receiving a mental health diagnosis can be scary, nor just for the person receiving the diagnosis, but for the entire family. When one partner receives a mental health diagnosis—whether it’s depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, or another condition—it can reshape the foundation of the relationship. It's important for everyone to try to understand the diagnosis and how it may show up in the relationship and family. H

  8 Tips to Get Your Family  Back Into a Weekly Routine By now, most of you with children have or are getting back into the weekly routine.  You know, the one that seems to go completely to the wayside during Summer Vacation? Many families struggle to get back into a reasonable routine for the School Year.  And by the time they do, it's time for the holidays and Winter Break, and everything is thrown off again. So in this week's blog post, I provide 8 tips to help you get back on track with a weekly family routine that's sure to help everyone. Tip #1 - Morning Routine - Start the Day Right: Mornings set the tone of the entire day.  Organized and productive families typically have a consistent morning routine that gets everyone up and moving with minimal stress.  Everyone knows what to expect and does what they need to do.  This might include a scheduled wake-up time, breakfast together, and a checklist for everyone's responsibilities, like making beds, packing backpacks