This Therapist's Therapy

  The Importance of Disclosing Personal History to Your Spouse As I have asked around for blog post topics, this topic emerged several times. So, I thought we would go ahead and tackle this important subject. In every relationship, especially in marriages, open communication is key to building trust and deepening intimacy. Disclosing personal history to your spouse can be a daunting task, but it is a crucial aspect of fostering a strong and resilient partnership. This can include information anywhere from body count to childhood trauma and anything in between. This blog post explores the significance of sharing your past experiences, how it can enhance your relationship, and practical tips for making this disclosure a positive experience. Why Disclosing Personal History Matters Building Trust: Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship. When you choose to disclose personal history, you demonstrate vulnerability. This openness invites your spouse to reciprocate, leading to a

                           Mental Illness in Marriage:                                Understanding & Managing One Partner's Diagnosis Marriage is often seen as a partnership built on love, trust, and companionship, but what happens when one partner is diagnosed with a mental health condition? The impact can be significant, affecting not just the individual but also the dynamic of the relationship. Understanding this influence and finding ways to manage it together is essential for maintaining a healthy marriage. The Ripple Effect of a Mental Health Diagnosis Receiving a mental health diagnosis can be scary, nor just for the person receiving the diagnosis, but for the entire family. When one partner receives a mental health diagnosis—whether it’s depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, or another condition—it can reshape the foundation of the relationship. It's important for everyone to try to understand the diagnosis and how it may show up in the relationship and family. H

Finding Help Through Humor: The Therapeutic Power of Humor  Through Hardships As a therapist, I have witnessed firsthand the life changing power of humor in the lives of my clients. Life is often unpredictable and can throw unexpected hardships our way. Whether it's coping with grief, managing chronic illness, or navigating personal crises, the journey through these challenges can feel overwhelming. However, one of the most effective and underrated tools for resilience is humor.  In fact, I frequently use humor during my therapy sessions, because it tends to lighten the mood and allow people to drop their guard a bit. With that said, let me tell you a little bit about why and how humor can be helpful during therapy. The Role of Humor in Therapy Humor is more than just a brief moment in time, in which we escape from pain; it is a profound therapeutic tool that fosters healing and connection. In therapy, humor can serve several crucial functions: 1. Builds Rapport: Sharing a laugh c

  Between the Sheets: The Rollercoaster of Sex Drives in Marriage Marriage is a journey filled with ups and downs, and one aspect that often experiences significant fluctuations is sexual desire. The roller coaster of sex drives in marriage is a common experience for many couples, and understanding and navigating these changes can strengthen the relationship and enhance intimacy.  This is a common topic that frequently comes up during marriage counseling.  So, let's take a look together. Understanding the Fluctuations Sexual desire is influenced by a myriad of factors, both internal and external. Hormonal changes, stress levels, physical health, emotional well-being, and life circumstances all play a role in shaping one’s libido. In a marriage, these factors can affect each partner differently, leading to periods where sexual desires are perfectly aligned and times when they diverge significantly. Hormonal Changes: Hormonal fluctuations, such as those experienced during pregnancy,

  Dirty Little Secrets:   When Is It Okay to Keep a Secret in Marriage Marriage is a delicate dance where two people intertwine every aspect of their lives.  But sometimes there are things that we want to keep to ourselves or share only with close friends, separate from our spouse.  Or maybe there are times we need to bounce things off someone other than our spouse, to get a different perspective.  Or we just want to maintain a part of ourselves that feels like we can keep our own individual identity.  Often, this can be challenging to juggle. As a therapist, I've seen and heard firsthand, the impact that keeping secrets can have on the marital bond.  While some secrets are benign and incosequential, others can create holes that never heal.  In this post, we'll dive into the complexities of secrets in the marriage and discuss how couples can navigate these murky waters. The Nature of Secrets Not all secrets are created qual.  Some secrets are kept with the intention of protecti